What is the scariest incident with drugs or alcohol you’ve witnessed or personally experienced? How did it change you?
Um I guess the scariest time would honestly have to be the first time I smoked weed after I got off probation. It was like a week after I got off, I had been clean for like 2 or 3 years, and I got taken to this party by my ex Eric. It was a weird party because we just went over there to hang out with "Turtle", but his younger sister was having a party with all her high school wigger friends. Anyway I'm not a very socially comfortable person, especially when it was just a bunch of wigger kids and some big black guys, but they were nice and shared a blunt with me. Now I also have a very low tolerance for drugs, at least I did when I had been clean for so long. I got BLOWN OUT, and it didn't help that Eric left somewhere with Turtle. I had no idea how long he was gone for, I went upstairs and sat in the living room by myself on the couch, was dealing with this cracked out cat that had scabies or something (it had scabs and bald patches all over it, and randomly I would be petting it and it would just swipe it's paw out and scratch and hiss at me). I had no idea what was going on, I was in my head but my head felt all zoomed out like everything was a mile away. I called Eric and told him to come get me and it felt like he took an hour to get there. I guess that would be my worst high.
With alcohol that would also be with Eric, I was at a band practice with him, drinking Mike's Hard Lemonade, and we had been fighting because I was finding stuff on myspace between him and his fat ex Andrea. Not to mention I found a dirty thong in his room of hers. But anyway I started talking to him about it and got all sad and drunk. He left me in a corner by myself saying I was ridiculous and too emotional. So I ended up drinking about 2 of the big Mike's, then tried to assimilate myself into the practice and be more social. I ended up drinking almost an entire 5th of Jagermeister by myself, and I remember starting to see 2 of everything. Next thing I remember is crawling in the grass puking, Eric was standing above me and I grabbed at his legs trying to get up. He just stood by me and I remember his bandmates looking at me and shaking their heads and tsking. He said he was embarrassed of me and all his bandmates were saying "It's okay, it happens. Some people just can't hold their liquor. I remember being a lightweight like that."